A Spike Night before Christmas

'

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the crypt

Not a creature was stirring, not even clem

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that Reigne Alliana would soon be there

The vamps were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of blood danced in their heads;

And Buffy in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out in the cematary there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the coffin to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a 69 Camaro, the demons fleeing in fear,

With the immortal herself, a wicked smile on her face,

I knew in a moment it must be Reigne .

More rapid than eagles her witches they came,

As she whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Cyn! now, Anabela! now, Judes and Susan!

On, Cath! on Pixie ! on, Dementia and Jenn!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now stake away! stake away! stake away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the witches they flew,

With a bag full of stakes, and Reigne Alliana too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little foot.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Down thru the window Reigne came with a bound.

She was dressed all in fur, from her head to her foot,

And her clothes were all black like the color of soot;

A bundle of stakes she had flung on her back,

And she looked like a peddler just opening her pack.

Her eyes -- how they twinkled! her dimples how merry!

Her cheeks were like roses, which made me so randy

Her cute full lips were drawn up like a bow,
Which made me fling buffy right out the door
The cord of the rope she held in her teeth

As I let her tie me up like a Christmas wreath;

A wink of her eye and a twist of her head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

She spoke not a word, but went straight to her work,

And fulfilled all my fantasies; then turned with a jerk,

And licking her lips

She gave me such a deep kiss

She sprang to her Cammie, to her team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard her exclaim, ere she drove out of sight,"Happy Christmas to all, I love you dear Spike

and you better be dumping that slayer or you will have one pissed immortal on your hands…"