Lakeside and Old Songs Conclusion

He moaned as he released his tension and built up passion. It was a low long moan that made me drip with wanting him so. He bent his knees’ up, as I grabbed his sack and massaged it as it got tighter and tighter. He grabbed my head, gently pulling my hair and covering his stomach with it.
I knew his eyes were closed and his mouth was half open, smiling. I drank every last drop of him, sucking even harder to make sure there was nothing left. The taste of him on my tongue and lips was ecstasy to me. He made me wet, even though I’d never admit that to him. My jeans were dampened from the way he smelled, sweated and came.

He pulled me to him, and I lay there, breathing deeply in. Bob Segar was playing  (we got tonite babe, why don’t you stay, we got tonite who needs tomorrow, lets make it last, let’s find a way...).

I closed my eyes and put my head on his chest. He was breathing deeply also, the rise and fall of it, and his heart beating in time was soothing to my soul. His arm was around me, as he turned to kiss me on my lips.

“Feel better?” he asked.

I giggled. That was his thing, his words to everything, always asking, but never telling himself.

“Do you feel better?” I asked back.

“Well, it didn’t feel bad.”

“Well, I’m glad of that.” I said kissing him again, my tongue searching out his mouth.
My arms were around him, his body still hot and wet with sweat. I kissed his face, his neck, nibbling as he put his hand around my behind. I was getting all worked up again. It didn’t take much to do that around him. He had that certain something that made woman want him, desire him. He didn’t have to do anything other than just be there. They were drawn to him like flies to honey and he loved it. I think sometimes it put him off, as some would be a little more forward than he liked.

He liked control, to be the leader. He reminded me of a certain nascar driver. Always in front regardless of what it took to be there. Intimidation was the word that came to mind with some, and he didn’t know why they thought that. He never intimidated me, to which I thought was really funny in a way. I was never put off by his way of rushing in, then like the waves in the ocean, falling back for a while. He came and went with the tides and I accepted that as his way.
Did he have others that he was with? That he talked to often? Yes. Did that bother me as it would some? Why would it?

Who could hold the air? Who could catch the wind or hold the rays of the sun hostage? No one. He was all and elusive. He was who he was and no one would change him. Was he searching? Yes. And one of these days he would find what he was looking for. Right now, he was with me and me alone.





He rolled over and nuzzled my hair, putting his arms around me. I put my arm under his head, and put the other one around him. His body was still hot and sweaty, and it smelled so good. Sweat for some reason turned me on. I loved to smell it on him, because it was always clean, fresh. I licked some from his shoulder and closed my eyes at the taste. It was heaven to me, and I continued to lick it from his collar bone and down to his chest. He moaned a little as he began to massage my back.

I had to quit. I didn’t want things going any farther. He was great, and I didn’t mind satisfying him, but I just would rather not get too deep.

I got up, went to the truck and grabbed my shirt.

“Where ya going?” he asked.

“No where’s. want another beer?”

“Yeah, toss me one.” he got up from the blanket and went back over to the bushes to pee again.

“Now, are you sure there’s no poison ivy over here?” I heard as the stream hit the ground.

“Well now, I can’t be one hundred percent positive, but I’m pretty sure.” I said back as he came out from behind a laural bush.

I bent down to get his shorts and shook them just in case something might have crawled in. I rescued my shirt on the truck and put it back on, noting the look on his face when I did..

I brought them and the beer back over to the blanket for him. He stretched out, and put his legs up in the air, bent his knee’s and put his shorts on. I laughed at the sight of him doing that. In the moon light it was a very strange sight to see, and I was so glad that no one else was there at that spot.

He rolled over and smiled at me, and his eyes glistened in the darkness, as I went over to lay back down next to him.                      

(Till now I always got by on my own, I never really cared until I met you, and now it chills me to the bone..how do I get you alone...you don’t know how long I’ve wanted to touch your lips and hold you tight...)

The riff to the song was playing and I just held him with my eyes closed. I could never tell him how I felt. He was the one to make me care again, after all this time, all these centuries of not having, I finally did, only to know in my heart that it would never last. He was who he was to me, which was someone to be with ,if only for a little while. He would leave, I knew that. Find someone who could be with him all the time and not just when ever. He told me once, that if ever he did, I was to be his little secret which meant that I would still be in his life. It made me feel good in my heart that he was still willing to let me be there.. I never pushed him, always letting him be the one to call me. When he wanted me, I was here. I loved his company, his ways. The way he cocked his head when he was discussing something, the way he’d go off the deep end at one little comment only to come back down to earth after he thought about it. He was a kind caring man, someone who sometimes kept his guard up, so as not to be hurt (don’t we all?), he was deeper than he would ever admit to being, and wise beyond his years. He never saw what I saw in him, and he never gave himself enough credit for the person he was. Sure, his past was checkered somewhat, but we all have our skeletons in the closet, and I never asked. I knew that in time, he would trust me as much as I already trusted him and so I waited for that time to come.

He was to me sometimes a lost little boy searching for some one to take care of him...and when he was with me, I tried. I tried to be his friend, his lover, but never over stepping the bounds, and never wanting to overstay my welcome with him. He was the one to always come to me. I sometimes let him know that I was thinking about him, but I never wanted to be a bother to him, or a pest. What he gave I loved, and what was left unsaid was never brought up. It was safer that way, always.


He felt so good in my arms, so right, like it was meant. I never questioned why me..okay, yeah I did, but I didn’t often, because if I thought too hard about it, it would drive me nuts. I never understood why he even gave me the time of day when we started talking. And now, I guess none of that mattered. Here. The lake. The full moon. That was what mattered.

Summer solstice was here, mercury was out of retrograde finally and the moon was full. Couldn’t get any better than that I thought. I could feel him relax as another song began....(I’m gonna be here for you baby I’ll be a man of my word, speak the langueage in the voice that you have never heard, I want to sleep with you forever...I’m gonna love you, like nobody loves you , and I’ll learn you’ll trust making memories of us...). He wasn’t much for country, but it seemed he liked this one, as he began to hum it in my ear (I wanna stand out in a crowd for you...I wanna make your world better than it’s ever been, and I’m gonna love you like nobody loves you...). I melted in his arms as the tears silently ran down my cheeks. He couldn’t see them, so it didn’t matter. I couldn’t swallow back the pain in my heart at that moment. (I’m gonna be here for you from now on, you ‘ve been stretched to the limits but it’s all right now..) The song faded out into the night air and over the lake like a gentle breeze.

His head rested on my chest now, and I played with his still damp hair, running my hands through it. I kissed the top of his head as he lay there, almost asleep, curled up as close as he could possibly get to me.

And the phone rang. Of all times, and all places, the phone began it’s trek of beethovens fur elise.
Too bad it couldn’t have been his moonlight sonata, that would have been ironic.
I fished it out of my pocket as he looked up at me questionly.

“This had better be someone calling about someone dying or who ever is on the other end will..” I whispered with anger in my voice.

Then I heard her laugh. Lhiannan. Of all the times and places, she had to call now.

“Well. Didja getcha some?” she inquired, still giggling.

“What are you doing calling?” I asked.

“I could feel you and I knew something was going on in that spirit of yours. You are undecided about things and it’s about time you are deciding on what to do with that boy.”

“I am not, what you said.” I said without trying to raise suspicion with him.

I was still playing with his hair as I talked to her. It just seemed so natural to be doing that.

“Dear, yes you are. I bet you gave him one hell of a job, and you are laying there with him right now, tears drying on your face because of some song that said your heart, now tell me I’m wrong.”

God. I hated it when she was right. How many times had she been right? Only a few thousand. I lost count after the first five hundred. I sighed. She felt it.

“You’re wrong.” I smiled to my self.

“And you love, are lying and you know it.” I could hear it in her voice. That matter of fact way she had when she knew it.

“Okay. I admit it.”

She giggled. “That’s better, now whatcha gonna do about it?”

I furrowed my brow. What was I going to do about it?

“I don’t know.” I whispered. He was nodding off to sleep, I felt his whole body give into the darkkness and the tiredness that I knew he felt.

“I think you do know, and you are too scared to admit it. Do I need to come up there and lead you through this? Because you KNOW I will. I will come up there and shake you down and give you what for and leave.”

I rolled my eyes and smiled. She would. She would come up here, and do that right in front of him. Like me, she didn’t care to tell you when the chance arose. She kept me sane. She was my grounding that I needed sometimes when I felt like I was floating away . There were times that I thought I was going insane, and out of no where, the phone would ring, or I would hear a car pull up. She just always knew.

“Alright already. You really think I need to give in huh?”

“Yep I do. I think your sacral chakra is blocked, and with a little work on my end, I think things will perk up so to speak.” she laughed.
                  
“Fine. I’ll give in. I’ll go for it, how’s that?”

“That’s what I wanted to hear. I think that you will be pleasantly surprised by what happens.”

That mystified me. Her words. She was really good at reading people. She just knew. And I always trusted her.

“Listen, I’ve got to go alli is trying to turn over, and she gets pissy when she can’t on her own. Call me later when you get the chance. I love you sissy!”

I smiled, “I love you too sissy, bye.”

“Bye.”

And with that, I closed the phone and stuck it back in my pocket.

It was good just having him lay here like this. He snored slightly and jerked a little in his sleep. Must be dreaming. I knew he was tired when he got here. He had driven for a while, but this time he wanted to see the lake. I’m glad he did.

He stirred some, and curled back up next to me. I closed my eyes as I felt the night wind kiss my face again. Give in, I thought. Just give in. What did I have to lose? Nothing.
Fear was a bad thing that I held on to sometimes. And with what Lhiannan said, I just needed to jump off the cliff on faith.

(I wanna kiss you all over..and over again...I wanna kiss you all over, till the night closes in...till the night closes in...